Mum's Best Hot Water Bottle (Spring Green)

We owe it all to Slavoljub Eduard Penkala.  Slavoljub (known as Eddy to his friends) was an Austrian inventor who became a Croatian tinkerer and through the power of endless helpings of Dalmatinska pašticada became the inventor of the mechanical pencil.  As we all know, the mechanical pencil is the bane of every school kid who likes to go to the pencil sharpener during a scantron test in the vain attempt to memorize Reggie’s bubble answers while en route.  With a mechanical pencil, all you can do is pretend to be out of lead, and thus have to ‘search for refills’ aka peep at your barely legible cheat sheet in your backpack.  You can always fit more answers on your cheat sheet if you use college ruled paper.  The nice thing about a mechanical pencil: it’s always sharp.  Or sort of sharp. It’s not like you can sharpen it.  Sharp enough to write really small test answers on a scrap of college ruled paper.  The invention of the mechanical pencil caused quite a stir around about 1907, and the resulting Penkalomania would not subside for at least 2 weeks.  Eddy also invented solid pen ink, some airplane parts no one remembers, and of course the contemporary version of the hot water bottle.  Or has he called it, the Termofor.  Catchy.  

He could have used one in 1922.  Penkala was on a business trip. While returning home he inexplicably became first quite wet then very cold.  Probably something to do with a powerpoint presentation.  He was admitted to the hospital with severe pneumonia.  Eddy requested a draft of his famous Radium Vinovica patent medicine. Radium Vinovica contained radium, known to produce a fine glow in recipients including but not limited to anyone with rheumatism, the target audience.  Needless to say, he should have asked for a Termofor, which might have saved him.  Who knows what he would have invented next.  

The Fifth Season Water Sack, aka the Fifth Season Termofor is a high quality rubber sack with a screw closure.  There’s a nice wooly Kabuto-gata that goes over the sack / bladder, which makes it feel more like a warm cat and less like you are dealing with Gram’s colostomy bag.  How does it work?  You boil some water (in a kettle, not in the sack, preferably in an electric kettle be properly British about it, although why electric kettles > range kettles I’ll never know… seems to me electricity and water are best kept separate) and then pour the water into the rubber sack. Close the cap.  Slide the wooly Kabuto-gata over it, and sit on it.  Or sit with it behind your back.  Or lay down and watch Antiques Road Show (Damn that Shackelford!) with it on your stomach.  Basically stick it on whatever hurts, and it will feel better.  Doesn’t work for broken bones.  Does work for muscle aches, cramps, weird leg twitches.  Also handy for really cold camping situations to keep your toes warm, which was the original purpose of a hot water bottle. To warm up your bed.

• Medical-grade Lifetime Warranty Latex Rubber Water Bladder
• Can be used with hot (not quite boiling) water or ice water
• Cotton flannel cover with all cotton batting insulation, cotton tab, leather label